I Don’t Care

Man and woman holding hands next to water at sunset. Photo credit: Canva.com.

I don’t care about your weaknesses.
I have plenty of my own.
Let’s work on them together.

I don’t care about your sharp words.
They are open wounds that need
the gentle balm of sunlight.

I don’t care about your sins.
You know all of mine.
Why remember what heaven
promises to forget?

I only care about the
piercingly authentic,
perfectly imperfect,
tenderly affirming,
unassuming,
unadorned You.

Michael James Fitzgerald

Winter Lessons

I waited for you
unblinkingly
by the side
of the road.
Spring, summer,
autumn, winter.

On a snowy afternoon,
you sent me
a stranger instead
with suffering tires
and eyes that
could shatter glass.

I dug in her trunk
for an elusive jack,
ruining my best suit,
the one I’d put on
for a different
occasion.

When she
drove happily off,
I looked up
and saw your face
smiling wryly
behind
thin clouds.

Michael James Fitzgerald

Temple Prayers

Draper Utah temple lighted at night.
Draper Utah Temple, December 6, 2020

Last night, I felt inspired to drive up to the Draper Temple. I was happy to see a number of cars parked there, all facing the Lord’s brilliantly lit house. I didn’t speak to anyone but His presence quietly unified us. I sensed reverence, faith, and tender pleas for help and guidance all around me.

I felt the fire of God’s presence. An unusual prayer came fell from my lips. It was real and came from my heart. I know He listened to me. I know He was there with me. I felt at one with Him and at peace.

I’m having a very difficult life right now. An extremely blessed life, but difficult. When you have the gravel of the world ground into your face time and time again, you learn lessons. One lesson I’ve learned is that if I don’t have the pure faith of a child, I will not be welcomed into God’s presence, now or in the next life. If I am not in His presence, with a broken heart and a contrite spirit, I have nothing.

So, I lay all my attitudes, all my ideas, all my prejudices on His altar. I don’t hold onto them because I know they’re deeply flawed. I hold all my opinions in contempt. I trust God and try every day to do what He asks. That is the only way I have survived. It’s where I take my stand. With God, with His Church, with His anointed. I don’t worry about anything else.

I claim to have my convictions, but I don’t care who’s “right.” I know God is right. I trust the path that leads to Him. That’s the only thing that matters to me now. I’m a train wreck of a human being, but God is happy with me sometimes in spite of my failures. It’s truly the only thing I have—His kind words and approbation.

I’m not sure what I would do without the gift of prayer. It’s a balm to my spirit and an anchor to my soul. It lends my spirit wings and my heart song.

I know my Father lives and loves me. I love to own Him as my Father. He was there with me last night. He made His presence known to me in a holy way.

I fall far short of who I want to be, but no matter how far I fall, I’m never beyond the His reach and care.

May you and I always speak His name in awe for that is what He truly deserves.