To Everything There Is a Season, Part 3: Sacred Boundaries

Below are the slides from yesterday’s presentation given during the third hour, “To Everything There Is a Season, Part 3: Sacred Boundaries.” One of the key points from this presentation is that we must build all relationships—especially romantic ones—on respect and trust, otherwise love cannot thrive.

You can download the presentation in PowerPoint format from here.

Here is the link to the table of contents of A Parent’s Guide.

Here is a link to the book I mentioned, How to Talk about Sex with Your Child, by Richard and Linda Eyre.

Thank you for reading.

Winter

Winter meant no harm last Sunday night
when she stormed into our little town.
She was just having one of her days.

She misses her luminous friend, who
moved away suddenly, mumbling
about a long South American vacation.

Friendless and lonely, there is no telling what
she’ll do this time of year.

Sometimes her tears freeze on descent, then pile up
like great pillows of sorrow, or she howls away the
night until the house creaks, joints aching from the cold.

Winter forces us inside, next to the fire—
the sun’s small ember—who whispers
urgently: “We just have to wait her out.”

The warm room stills our passion for movement,
quiets the mind so, at the moment sleep begins, we
hear a lone snowflake descending, finally able to
decode the mystery of its fragile message.

Michael James Fitzgerald

Intimacy in Marriage Presentation

This is the presentation I gave on emotional, spiritual, and physical intimacy in marriage during the third hour of block meetings on Sunday, December 30, 2007. We also gave out copies of Laura Brotherson’s excellent book on marital intimacy And They Were Not Ashamed. (I still have a few in the bishop’s office for those who want a copy. We also have CDs for loan.)

For a PDF of the content of the slides, click here. You can also see it below. Click on the screen icon on the lower-right corner to view the document at full screen.

Since giving this presentation, here’s a new summation of what I think a wife really wants from her husband:

  • To be loved and cherished by him more than any other person or other thing
  • To be the most important person in his life
  • To feel that no one else or nothing else is in higher demand for his attention
  • To be willing to listen to her needs and frustrations and to talk about his feelings
  • To respect her wishes, even if he can’t fulfill them at the moment
  • To show her affection daily (without strings attached for physical intimacy)
  • Speaking respectfully of her in front of others, especially the children, even when she is not present
  • To forgive her for her mistakes and shortcomings and work with her gently for solutions
  • To ask her on dates regularly—to court her and to surprise her with unexpected adventures, especially romantic ones
  • To be helpful and cooperative when working with the children and with work in the home—to be willing to cook and change diapers and clean bathrooms, for starters
  • To be willing to sacrifice so that she can do things to achieve her true potential
  • To never forget the power and importance of flowers, chocolates and love notes

And this is what your husband really wants from his wife:

  • To respect him and honor him
  • To show him gentleness and tenderness—this is the irresistible force that will draw him to his wife forever
  • To believe in him and to trust him, even though he makes mistakes
  • To forgive him for his mistakes and shortcomings and work with him kindly for solutions
  • To support him in his work and career and church responsibilities
  • Speaking respectfully of him, especially in front of the children and her friends, even when he is not present
  • To create a cheerful, welcoming home environment
  • To be helpful and cooperative with money and other issues that are his main concern
  • To give him his space and allow him to recharge with activities of his choosing
  • To be willing to sacrifice so that he can do things to achieve his true potential

What else would be on your list? or what would take off? Please comment.

Leaves

Leaves, beautiful in death,
lie scattered on the ground like
memories fallen in battle,

The voice of color
lighting up the earth with the
last plumage of the dying year.

They clatter in the golden breeze,
in language too old to remember,
too familiar to forget.

Mother tree, drowsy with cold,
sings a lullaby to her windswept children,
a tender farewell that only they can hear.

Lingering sunshine eases the pain of days.
The light’s constant purpose
draws our eyes forever to the sky.

Michael James Fitzgerald

To Everything There Is a Season Presentation

Here are the slides from yesterday’s presentation on youth and dating.

Click here for the text of the slides as a PDF. They would be good talking points for a discussion with your teenager or for a family home evening.

Here is the link to the table of contents of the resource I mentioned at the end of the presentation: A Parent’s Guide.

Here also is a link to a PDF version of the For the Strength of Youth pamphlet.

To download the short story about Marli and Luke in PDF, click here. If you would like a printed copy, just contact me by email and I’ll get you a copy.

Thank you for reading.

A Wedding on the Trail—November 2, 1856

One of the rescuers that traveled from the Salt Lake valley to assist the handcart companies was 28-year-old James B. Cole. James had had a dream in which he saw his future wife, a beautiful young woman who wore a fur cap bound on her head with a green scarf. He told his dream to a friend and fellow rescuer William H. Kimball.

As the two men rode into camp of the Willie Handcart Company on October 21, 1856, William spotted the girl with the fur cap and green scarf and told James, “There is your dream girl.” It was 23-year-old Lucy Ward who had been traveling by handcart with a group of young women.

It was on this day, November 2, in 1856, that less than two weeks after meeting, that James B. Cole and Lucy Ward were married at Fort Bridger. They spent the winter of 1856–1857 at nearby Fort Supply which had been built by the Mormons in 1853. Lucy regained her health and by the spring of 1857, James and Lucy were able to move to the Salt Lake Valley.